9.16.2014

Some Pre Waiting Advice

I don't really think I am the most qualified person to tell you how to prepare for waiting, but I wrote this anyway. Here is a list of things I wish I would have known or done before I started waiting. So here you go: Again, these are not meant to insult anyone so if any of these do, sorry! Go ahead and feel free to add some of your tips too if you'd like:)

1. It's okay to cry, it's okay to be upset. Yes, he is doing a great thing, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. It will hurt, but you'll be okay...in the mean time, let those tears out. Don't hold it in. I am a strong believer that crying is good for you.

2. Seek for support. If your roommate or parents aren't supportive of your decision to wait, you can join this awesome group. I am a member of it and it is by far the least judgmental out of all the groups. It is based on love and it is full of girls at different stages of their wait, but they are all there for you to cry with you or to celebrate each milestone.

3. Turn to God. I know it seems like super standard type of advice, but we often forget that Jesus sacrificed himself for us and that he feels the pain we are feeling. This is a real trial, no matter what anyone says, turn to Heavenly Father when the days get hard.

4. Trust in God. It's okay if you don't end up with your missionary. That doesn't make you a failure or a part of a statistic. If you are constantly counseling with the Lord and He tells you that you should walk down another path, then it's okay to let go.

5. Make plans during the first few weeks he is gone. Specially during the first weeks he is gone. The day Joey left I went to a birthday party and surrounded myself by my best friends. The Friday after I went to a concert and then after that I went to a Kahuku football game. Why? To keep my mind off thinking about him being gone. Staying home and crying for the first few weeks is not healthy and you should not do it. It's okay to make plans and go out and have fun with your friends. It will make the time go by faster, I promise.

6. Don't expect to hear from him during the first week. Joey didn't email me until the second week and I didn't get a letter until he third week and I've also heard about a lot of girls that don't get emails during the first week their missionary is out. Sometimes they are only allowed to email their family and that's okay. Don't panic. I waited a long time for my letters and email and it was well worth it. :)

7. Don't expect a phone call from the airport either. All the girls seem to always get phone calls and we get so excited thinking we will get one too and then we don't and our whole day is ruined. You really shouldn't be expecting a phone call from the airport, I don't really know how it works but for Joey it was against the rules and I was okay with not talking to him. If he is not allowed to call you when he is at the airport from the MTC to wherever he was called to, find comfort in knowing that he is an obedient missionary. I always find comfort in that because I know that obedience is going to make him a better man.

8. It's okay if you aren't super crafty and can't make awesome themed packages. Have you looked up missionary package ideas on pinterest? It is full of great ideas for packages. All of these are nicely packaged and it looks super good. It looks like someone put a lot of effort into them and sometimes it can leave you feeling like you aren't doing enough. I am here to tell you that if you aren't craft, it's okay. Your missionary will love the package just the same. I still admire all the girls that are able to make their packages look good, but I just never could do it. haha

9. Set goals. Before he leaves, set goals, both spiritual and temporal. If you want to go abroad, now is your time, if you want to do something completely different, now is the time. This is the time for you to grow temporally and spiritually. Make goals to read the scriptures, to magnify your callings or to server more.

10. Waiting is hard, kids. It doesn't matter what anyone tells you, waiting is hard. It will always be hard. During the next two years you are going to have a lot of ups and downs, you are going to meet people who will change your life, and so will he. You are going to hurt and smile and forget and then remember all over again. It is a very emotional process, it is hard. But whatever path you take, Heavenly Father is going to be there to support you. Whether you make it through the 2 years or whether you find your happily ever after somewhere else, you're going to be making hard decisions. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You are a strong daughter of God and He loves you and you can do anything.


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